Happy Valentine's Day...let's argue

I saw this article in the Guardian online and thought Valentine’s Day is an appropriate time for the thought.  The gist of it:  couples who argue together, stay together.

A survey of almost 1000 adults found that arguing “effectively” means you are 10 times more likely to have a happy relationship than those who avoid or sweep their issues under the rug.

The author of a NYT best seller “Crucial Conversations” says avoiding an issue because you’re afraid of the argument affecting the relationship is a sure backfire.  Instead, that avoidance allows your annoyance or grievance to build up until you can’t stand it anymore and then you’re certain to discuss it poorly.  Read that as explode. 

In the survey 80% of the couples said poor communication contributed to previous failed relationships.

So, how to argue effectively….I’ve linked you to the article. Two key tips:  manage your thoughts and deal in facts.

Happy Valentine’s Day, let’s argue.

Shara Fryer

Shara Fryer

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